Political Consultants Are Going to Hate Me (Even More) for Writing This
Hoo-boy.
I was doing the ol’ “should-I-or-shouldn’t-I” thing in bed at four o’clock this morning.
And I know I shouldn’t write this one. It’s gonna p*ss off a lot of political insiders.
But then I remembered something my late friend Herman Cain – who sadly passed away six years ago this week – used to always say:
“I does not care.”
So once more unto the breach, my friends, once more. Buckle up.
* * *
You wanna know the real reason why conservatives keep losing so many close elections?
No, it’s not the Democrats. No, it’s not the fake news media. No, it’s not a lack of good Republican candidates. And no, it’s not election interference by the Chinese commies.
It’s the PPCC: Professional Political Consulting Class.
My disdain for the vast majority – not all – of them knows no bounds and seems to grow every day.
In fact, Muth’s Truths #3 at the start of my Campaign Book Camps goes like this:
“There’s more incompetence in the field of political consulting than in any field other than TV psychiatry.”
And I’m not just talking about local PC’s who volunteered in one election cycle licking envelopes and pounding yard signs and suddenly think they’re Lee Atwater.
They then hang out a shingle and sell unsuspecting first-time candidates – who don’t know any better – that if they just buy the snake-oil and hire them, “Baby, I’m gonna make you a star!”
Heck, there’s one this cycle who actually talked his candidate in northern Nevada into running on banning Sharia law in Elko and Winnemucca – putting what should be a slam-dunk safe GOP seat in play for the Democrats.
And this is a PC who incessantly boasts of winning industry awards – bestowed upon him by an association of other PC’s. I think that might be the textbook definition of a “circle jerk.”
* * *
Indeed, the PPCC rot isn’t just home grown.
It emanates from the DC swamp as well, where over-priced, politically-connected geniuses run the same cookie-cutter, content-free campaigns cycle after cycle after cycle.
Some examples:
- Direct mail pieces that keep the same layout, headline structure, and attack language, changing only the candidate’s name, headshot, and opponent.
- TV ads built from the same formula: ominous music, grainy visuals, fast cuts, and a voiceover warning that the opponent will bring on Armageddon.
- Radio spots that use the same scary script structure across races, swapping in local names and issues.
- Generic candidate websites that use identical templates, stock photos, and issue-page language.
- Mailers or ads that are basically “fill in the blanks” versions of one another across different districts or states.
- Fear ads that rely on threatening imagery and emotional cues more than any real policy contrast.
But here’s the big problem with such conveyer-belt campaigns.
They look good and go along swimmingly in the beginning…until the campaign heats up. Then the wheels come flying off the apple cart.
* * *
Let’s take a quick break here.
I found the perfect short video clip to demonstrate what I’m talking about – and “Boomers” will especially enjoy this trip down Memory Lane.
That still cracks me up to this day. Pure comedy genius. But, onward…
* * *
Yes, I loathe these PC’s. More so every election cycle. But to be fair, they hate me right back. Even more.
Because I’m that kid standing on the sidewalk during the parade who points at the emperor and says, “Look, Mom, his tally-whacker’s hanging out!”
The thing is, you just can’t run the same campaign for different campaigns.
Every candidate is different. Every opponent is different. Every race is different. Every district is different.
As an extreme example, let’s just say you can’t run a MAGA campaign in New York City, Chicago, or Los Angeles.
Stick with me. I promise there’s a reason I’m going through all this. And it’s about “polling” and “messaging.”
* * *
The PPCC loves polling. They usually charge an arm and a leg for it. It’s very profitable. And here’s an example of what they do:
“Which ONE of the following do you think is the most important issue facing the country today?” (Select one)
- The economy / inflation
- Immigration
- Crime and public safety
- Healthcare
- Abortion
- Gun policy
- Education
- Climate change / energy
- Foreign policy / national security
- Government spending and the national debt
- Housing affordability
You see what they do here?
The consultant picks the questions, and the consultant picks the options the voter has to choose from.
Then the consultant tells his client what issue their messaging should be about.
Now, thirty-some years ago, when I was just a cub political activist, I attended Newt Gingrich’s campaign school in DC (well, actually, northern Virginia – but close enough).
Our “professor” – my Sensai – was Newt’s senior strategist, Joe Gaylord, the brains behind the Contract with America.
And while polling can, in limited cases – usually top-tier campaigns, not down-ballot races – be useful, Professor Gaylord taught us there was a much better, more effective way.
Trolling, not polling.
* * *
He advised (and this was before Al Gore invented the Internet) that you go out to the mall, a bar, a restaurant – anywhere where real people hang out, not political nerds – and LISTEN to what they’re talking about.
Whoa! Talk about a radical idea!
Better yet, without telling them you’re a candidate, ask them what’s p*ssing them off. What’s scaring them. What’s causing them to wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat.
The answers won’t be like “the economy.” Real people don’t talk like that. Instead, you’ll hear things like…
- “The cost of a Happy Meal has doubled.”
- “My kid's daycare costs more than my mortgage.”
- “Some guy broke into my neighbor's garage last week and nobody even came.”
- “I used to fill up my truck for forty bucks. Now it's ninety.”
- “My insurance premium went up again and I don't even go to the doctor.”
- “I can't get my kid into a decent school without moving.”
- “My son can't afford a starter home anywhere near where he grew up.”
That's the stuff that shows up when you stop asking “what issue matters most” and start listening.
Nobody says “inflation” at a bar. They say, “I can't afford eggs.”
* * *
Think about it.
Do you really think voters – especially non-ideological voters who often are the difference between winning and losing in a swing district – are going to be moved by a fancy, over-sized postcard blaring, “I’m going to fight inflation”?
Yet that’s the crap the PPCC for Republicans keep putting out election cycle after election cycle.
And then we all wonder why we lose races we should have won.
Instead, candidates should talk about issues the voters are talking about.
And in the way the voters are talking about them.
And then explain what you’ll do to relieve their pain.
And you don’t even have to go to a mall or restaurant or bar to find out anymore.
We have this new-fangled thing called “social media.” You might have heard of it.
Just go on X or Facebook and let your fingers to the scrolling-trolling.
I mean, the conversations there are RAW.
People don’t hold back when they’re behind their keyboards. Completely unrestrained, unfiltered, and often unhinged.
Wanna know how they “really feel”? Believe me, they’ll tell you!
* * *
Which brings me to the point of all this.
As some of you know, I’m an adviser to the campaigns of four of my Campaign Boot Camp graduates.
I call them my “Core Four.”
They’re actually more like the “Fantastic Four.”
To Democrats, they’re probably more like “The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.”
But Core Four rhymes and sounds better. So I’m going with that.
Anyway, for the last several months they’ve been monitoring what people are talking about on social media and telling them at the door.
And they’ve reported back that there were three certain things they kept hearing and seeing over and over again on a certain issue.
The sort of things you’ll never see on a PPCC list of polling questions.
And on Monday, we’ll make an announcement explaining exactly what those issues are what they plan to do about them.
To tease a little preview of what’s to come, check out the quote below under “Famous Last Words.”
Don’t touch that dial!
Chuck
P.S. If they find my body buried six feet deep in a pine box out in the middle of the desert tomorrow, put PC Woody Johnston at the top of the suspect list. I think – but I’m really not sure – this is him during a recent strategy meeting at campaign HQ. 😊
FAMOUS LAST WORDS
“Political campaign consulting is a big business. Unfortunately, too many campaign consultants are not professional. Most learn by trial and error, by working as a junior aide in a campaign right out of college.
“Few have spent much time reading and studying about their profession. Most have probably never read a marketing book…
“Most Republican political consultants are like a groundhog – they know one thing. And that one thing is a campaign needs lots of money to run lots of ads, for which they are compensated by receiving about 15% of the cost of the ad.
“Few Republican campaigns know what constitutes a ground game, and they seldom have a credible, serious one. . . . Also, campaign consultants haven’t figured out how to send a 15% invoice for a ground game.”
– Richard Viguerie, “Go Big,” 2022