(Chuck Muth) – It’s Christmas Eve, so I thought I’d lighten the mood for today’s Muth’s Truths and share a humorous oldie-but-goodie story recanted this week by our friend Steve Moore of the Committee to Unleash Prosperity…
A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in Montana when suddenly a brand-new 2019 BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.
The driver named Cliff – in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, and RayBan sunglasses – leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, “If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?”
Bud answers, “Sure, why not?”
Cliff parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Apple iPhone, and surfs the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.
Within seconds, he receives an email on his Apple iPad that the image has been processed and the data stored.
“You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves,” he says.
“That’s right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves,” says Bud.
He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.
Then Bud says to the young man, “Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?”
The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, “Okay, why not?”
“You’re a member of Congress,” says Bud.
“Wow! That’s correct,” says Cliff. “But how did you guess that?”
“No guessing required.” answered the cowboy. “You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew the answer to. You used millions of dollars’ worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are. And you’re clueless about how working people make a living – or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep.”
“Now give me back my dog.”
* The Biden Dilemma: He needs to convince the unvaccinated that the COVID vaccine works in order to get them to take their first two jabs, while at the same time convince the vaccinated that the vaccine doesn’t work in order to get them to take a booster jab. Good luck with that.
* Wake up call for Nevada: California’s small-scale marijuana operations are in trouble. Seems the government slapped taxes on the legal version so high that people are opting to save money by buying off the street from the illegal market. Go figure. Who coulda seen this coming?
* For those interested in an update on the Brittany Sheehan mess – where she was arrested for lawfully signing her custodial daughter out of a school in California – click here.
* Yes, I’ve been threatened with political payback if I don’t get on the “Laxalt for U.S. Senate” bandwagon in the Nevada GOP primary. No, I don’t respond well to such threats. Never have. In fact, I usually double-down after such threats are made. Would someone please pass this word on to Ric Grenell?
Ugh. Carnival Cruise lines will be requiring that all passengers be fully vaccinated at least 14 days before departure at least through March 31, 2022 – which would keep a number of folks in our group from going on our (usually) annual Mexican Riviera conserva-cruise
And even that isn’t good enough.
Cabo San Lucas, one of the ports-of-call where we usually stop, decided last week that every disembarking passenger also needed to be tested before getting off the ship. The time this would have required wasn’t enough to allow all passengers to get off the ship, so the port call was cancelled and everyone spent an extra day at sea.
None of us has any idea when all this COVID crapploa is gonna end.
However, according to the latest correspondence I received from Carnival, we have to re-book our conserva-cruise trip by March 22, 2022 in order to redeem the ship-board credit we each got when our 2019 cruise was cancelled…though we can schedule the cruise for anytime up to September 30, 2023.
I’m still playing this by ear. At this point, I’m inclined to maybe consider booking our next cruise for the week or so after next year’s general election…or just wait until the spring of 2023
We still have a couple more months before we have to make a spit-or-get-off-the-pot decision. Any thoughts or ideas you might have, send ‘em along.
FAMOUS LAST WORDS
“According to the PBS/Marist poll, Biden’s approval among white Americans stands at 40 percent versus 33 percent of Hispanics, with a disapproval rating among white people at 56 percent versus Hispanics at 65 percent.” – Breitbart News, 12/21/21
“When asked to name the president who has done the best job over the past 40 years…Republicans are divided between a president who served in the 1980s – Ronald Reagan – and the one who left office this year, Donald Trump. About four-in-ten Republicans and Republican-leaning independents (42%) say Reagan has done the best job as president over the past 40 years, while slightly fewer (37%) say Trump has done the best job.” – Pew Research Center, 12/20/21
Mr. Muth is president of Citizen Outreach, publisher of Nevada News & Views and blogs at MuthsTruths.com